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1. |
Marked for Error
01:33
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2. |
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Between six people they shared three rooms
And kept the windows closed because of toxic fumes
They worked all day and they worked until first sunlight
But once the weekend came, they owned the air of the Saturday night
Yeah baby
This is movement therapy
Nothing left to do once it all looks the same
Yeah baby
This is freak out therapy
No pictures left to take once it all looks the same
The fringes are everything
The center is irrelevant
The way that you look tonight
Is oh so decadent
I feel exquisite
But take it as a testament
The way that I feel tonight
Is so damn irrelevant
“Yeah,” he danced and he screamed and he said, “I won’t live past thirty
But at least I’ve got three floral shirts and I own five suits
I spent my last paycheck on my eighth pair of shoes”
Yeah baby
This is movement therapy
Nothing left to do once it all looks the same
Yeah baby
This is freak out therapy
No pictures left to take once it all looks the same
And then they drove away. Off into Saturday night
The posse seeking retribution, which was their due. It was their right.
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3. |
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So I scrimped
And I saved
And I scrimped
And I saved
Now I’m lost among the alleys I used to know
And I don’t recognize the places I used to go
Took my time
Paid my dues
Did the work
Followed through
I didn’t stand for any bullshit but I never picked
A fight without good reason but now tonight
I can’t help but stop and wonder if maybe I
Made all the wrong decisions since nothing looks the same
Here I am
Once again
Here I am
Once again
I am running through the streets that I used to love
We got lost in endless daydreams and fantasies of
Perpetual motion with no sense of shame
Here I am and nothing looks the same
There was me and there was Ivy
And there was Craig and there was Ruth
And there was the three of them all lost
In morning hangovers of youth
And there I was just trying to be clear
Trying to explain what I’d done for the past ten years
So they change the subject quick, cause they know can’t relate
And so I’m silent and I’m pensive as I watch them celebrate
I’m ten steps removed from notions of the truth
I’m ten steps removed from old pictures of me and you
I’m ten years removed
I’m ten years removed
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4. |
Drag Race
01:52
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Okay first time racers, when the flag goes down, you will be scared.
Engines?
Check.
Headlights?
Check.
Lipstick?
Check.
Leggings?
Check.
Drag race.
Okay second round is coming up.
Drag race.
I used to dream about being someone else
Couldn’t look in the mirror. Couldn’t look at myself.
Until I learned to drive and then I learned to steer
And then I learned I wasn’t broken I was genderqueer
You know I’m not a man and you know I’m not a girl
Gotta put the pedal to the metal when that flag unfurls
It’s the look in my eyes. It’s the makeup on my face.
I was born for drag and I was born to race.
Drag race.
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5. |
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This is my national anthem, that I’m singing to myself as I walk to the cross town bus
This is my national anthem, and it’s scratched into the seats of the cross town bus
This is my national anthem, that I’m singing to myself as I walk past the guy selling fifty cent pomegranates but I gotta say no thanks cause the last time I cut one it bled into the shape of my old neighborhood and I’m just on the roof reading oversized books.
If you see me in hell, you can cast a spell
This is her personal shopper - you can tell it by the X’s in her eyes.
If you see me in hell, you can cast a spell
It’s not that I don’t need it. It’s just that I don’t want it.
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6. |
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Disconnect
Stop to think
Chew the fat
Sip the drink
Fantasize
And dramatize
Energize
Idealize
Fall in love on Monday, make a stranger on Tuesday
Quit your shitty job and get a new one by Wednesday
Thursday coin a phrase and call it 4 AM stubble
Friday write a journal, call it I LOVE TROUBLE
Disconnect
Stop to think
Chew the fat
Sip the drink
Reconnect
Big regret
Reorganize
Outstanding debts
It’s not that I don’t need it.
It’s just that I don’t want it.
First I was sad
Then I was crazy
Then I got sick
Now I’m just…
Disconnect
Stop to think
Chew the fat
Sip the drink
Fantasize
And dramatize
Energize
Idealize
Stress nap cannonball - whatcha gonna do
Everyone’s blue prints gonna come for you
Make a detailed schedule then throw it in the trash
Everyones seams are gonna come unglued
It’s not that I don’t need it.
It’s just that I don’t want it.
First I was sad
Then I was crazy
Then I got sick
Now I’m just…
Disconnect
Stop to think
Chew the fat
Sip the drink
Reconnect
And absolve
Compromise
And then devolve
It’s not that I don’t need it.
It’s just that I don’t want it.
It’s not that I don’t need it.
It’s just that I don’t want it.
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7. |
Ivy Cochran
02:57
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I want to call in sick. I want to break my lease
I want to drive until I run out of gas
I don’t want directions, I don’t want to ask
I don’t want jobs, I don’t want cash
Just leave me by the roadside
Send me out with the riptide
I wash up on the seaside
At least I can go for a bike ride
But the air is full of pesticides
My sink pours mostly fluoride
I try to write but I’m tongue-tied
I need fresh air but I stay inside
I never knew that I never knew
I’ve got nothing I can cut into
We all know what we’ve all been through
But I want to leave here
The band is hot but they just can’t groove
Eyes bloodshot and my heart’s been bruised
Leave the club and hit the bricks
Doesn’t all the drywall make you sick?
Yeah!
Sharp edges have now been smoothed
Eyes bloodshot and my heart’s been bruised
Lots been developed but unimproved
So I want to leave here too
Strip mall carries me
Glowing light so clean
Worker drawn to queen
This all looks the same
Frame on copied frame
Like a moth to flame
The band is hot but they just can’t groove
Eyes bloodshot and my heart’s been bruised
Leave the club and hit the bricks
Doesn’t all the drywall make you sick?
Yeah!
My friends are all gone cause they’ve all been moved
Eyes bloodshot and my heart’s been bruised
Lots been developed but unimproved
So I want to leave here too
I never knew that I never knew
I’ve got nothing I can cut into
We all know what we’ve all been through
But I want to leave here
And break some glass, topple some regime
Get lost in someone’s far fetched dream
Rip through a screen, I want to scream:
The band is hot but they just can’t groove
Eyes bloodshot and my heart’s been bruised
Leave the club and hit the bricks
Doesn’t all the drywall make you sick?
Yeah!
Sharp edges have now been smoothed
Eyes bloodshot and my heart’s been bruised
Lots been developed but unimproved
So I want to leave here too
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8. |
Never Once Was
04:13
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My new hotel has a coffin for a bed
And double down pillows to rest my head
Will you still remember what I said?
It’s tricky getting in and it’s tricky getting out
It’s tricky when you think that you know what it’s about
It’s tricky when the plan is to lock the doors
And then it’s really tricky when they come back and ask for more
Never really thought about where you’d be
Once you spent about a decade on the scene
Was it really all that you thought you’d see
Data points just start to look plots of cemeteries
My new hotel has a coffin for a bed
And double down pillows to rest my head
Will you still remember what I said?
Yeah the scene is set. The curtain’s drawn
You can’t tell if its sunset or it’s dawn
The carpets now are freshly laid
The body’s still warm, it’s from yesterday
Yeah you gotta study all the rules and you do it by the book
You gotta do it and make sure that you don’t look like a crook
You feel like an anchor, like a piece of lead
You triple check your pulse to make sure you’re not dead
Call the front desk and check out of your head
Leave a tip for the cleaners on the table by the bed
My new hotel has a coffin for a bed
And double down pillows to rest my head
Will you still remember what I said?
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9. |
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I was downtown, near 65 ½ Third Street. I was feeling confused. I mean I wasn’t confused about where I was but I was feeling confused about who I was. I thought to myself, “Here I am in this city full of freaks dancing and chomping on licorice. They all know who they are and what they want and I can’t seem to figure it out.” So I called Ivy and she said, “Let’s go for a midnight walk at the graveyard.” So on my way over there I walked past 32 Second Street, and some bands were playing a house show. I poked my head inside.
I didn’t show up here just to float around
I’m gonna look up at the sky and plant my feet on the ground
I don’t mind if I’m another useless piece of history cause I just want to dive head first into an endless mystery
“Interesting,” I thought, “I’m gonna think more about that later.” I met Ivy at the Cemetery Gates. She said, “Dead people don’t have to think. You could learn a lot from them.” I thought to myself, “That’s not helpful.” We wandered amongst the tombstones with only the light of the full moon to guide us. I came across the grave for Moe Sampson, which said, “Struck by a meteorite, but died of cancer.” Before I could think too hard about that we walked past a sign that said “Straight ahead for the 36th annual meeting of the Cheap City Gravedigger’s Choral Union,” and off in the distance, this is what we heard:
The singers were standing in a giant circle and they were all holding shovels. They raised the shovels into the air and started swinging them around above their heads like little helicopters. Ivy said, “We should leave these weirdos alone. They’re having a good time.” So I told her about the bands playing down the street.
I didn’t show up here just to float around
I’m gonna look up at the sky and plant my feet on the ground
I don’t mind if I’m another useless piece of history cause I just want to dive head first into an endless mystery
I don’t mind if I’m another useless piece of history cause I just want to dive head first into an endless mystery
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10. |
Hogstown Tub
03:32
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This hurts like all hell but it feels so good to be alive
He winked and smiled to the congregation
I crawled on my hands and knees for ten whole years and now I think that I’ve finally arrived
I’m not a sinner tonight
But if you need a good fight
Stick ‘em up if you got guts son
I’m feeling good
I didn’t do what I should
I’ve broken my own rules
But I don’t feel like a bad guy
I guess it’s why
I feel so cold inside
Am I dead? I’m delirious and bleary-eyed
I’m out of sight in an all night drive
I feel so damn alive
You can judge me all you want but I won’t apologize for nothing
He said to the courthouse reporters
And then he unclenched his fists and then he blew a kiss to the crowds of his supporters
I ain’t no loser baby
But I’m no winner, maybe
But now you’re driving me crazy
I’m feeling good
I didn’t do what I should
I’ve broken my own rules
But I don’t feel like a bad guy
I guess it’s why
I feel so cold inside
Am I dead? I’m delirious and bleary-eyed
I’m out of sight in an all night drive
I feel so damn alive
Well you can hang me out to dry
But I’ll just sing with all the birds and fishes
I make my luck I’ve got no wishes
So you can’t judge me, no no no
Leave me dreaming out in the pasture
I’ve got no God and I’ve got no rapture
I’ve got no moral compass to capture
I’m just an all night stressed out fracture
It’s been ten years now, following the rules
I’ve been bad but I ain’t been cruel
Forget everything that I learned in school
You can see it by my scars and you can see it in my eyes
Well, I guess that’s why
I’m feeling good
I didn’t do what I should
I’ve broken my own rules
But I don’t feel like a bad guy
I guess it’s why
I feel so cold inside
Am I dead? I’m delirious and bleary-eyed
I’m out of sight in an all night drive
I feel so damn, I feel so damn, I feel so damn alive
I guess it’s why
I feel so cold inside
Am I dead? I’m delirious and bleary-eyed
I’m out of sight in an all night drive
I feel so damn alive
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11. |
Hop to It, Bob Huett
02:55
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Maybe I’m thinking too much
Maybe I need to close my eyes or
Maybe my heart’s beating fast
It’s beating right out of my skin
Maybe I need a change of pace
Maybe I need a different life or
Maybe I messed this one up
Or maybe I’m just bored of feeling
I don’t want to be bored
Anymore
Tired of the same old streets
And the same old faces
And the same old town
And the same old people I don’t want to be around
And I want to be positive
And I want to feel sane
And I want to feel like a different person
With a different name
And
I want my life to be more than just feeling bored
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12. |
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I know that he hates me and I like it like that
At least I think I do. Yeah I guess I like it like that.
I think about thinking harder on this distance and all of that
Tension between us and he likes it like that
At least I think he does, but I never thought to ask
So now we both pretend that we like it like that
This all happened over by City Hall
We sat on the benches that the mayor had just installed
It’s not a debate or a fight or a punch
It’s a stock market hotdog lunch
So now we’re in the park and the dogs are off the leash
And we’re just sitting in the park and we’re both staring at our feet
And I try to find the words to say exactly how I feel
So I just comment on the quality of this take out meal
And I know that he paid because I’m broke and always will be
And I wonder if our relationship just boils down to money
It’s not a debate or a fight or a punch
It’s a stock market hotdog lunch
I chose to walk home and I took sixth street
That’s where they race at night and something about how wide that street is
always clears my head
I whistled a little melody:
The guy that I’m talking about worked in one of the nameless office buildings over on Rue Avenue. Last time I saw him he came to my gallery opening and scowled the whole time.
It’s not a debate or a fight or a punch
It’s a stock market hotdog lunch
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13. |
Flu Feelings
02:58
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Last night back in town
I stopped and listened to the sound
Tried to stop thinking about the ground
Outside the show is where it hit me
The feeling that becomes a sniffle and then a sneeze
And then you danced your way past me on a warm summer breeze
Is where you drove us to the beach, waded in past your knees
Said I’ll stay here with you until I start to freeze
And looked into my eyes and
The feeling that hits me like a new flu
Thought we were okay but that’s not true
No matter how I decide to make do
I’m standing on the precipice without you
I adjusted the focus until it was just right
And I waited until we had the right light
But once I saw the truth it gave me such a fright
That I got the perfect picture while you said good night good night good night good night
The feeling that hits me like a new flu
When you don’t know you’re sick but that’s not true
Hit like a ton of bricks once I saw you
The gnawing in my heart just grew and grew and grew and grew and grew
Somewhere else later on I took a picture backstage
Something complex something simple something pretty and uncaged
And I felt like Fern, she was standing on the right
Forced to listen to these two ladies blather all night
Last time I thought about your car
It made me sick. I felt bizarre.
I know I won’t get very far
On thinking these
Memories can center me
Confuse me with thought debris
Saw the city for the trees
And made a plea
That this is the last and final time
I get nostalgic for your ride
Your jokes, your smile hit me like a landslide
But I’ve had enough
It’s not appealing
It’s left me reeling
All these flu feelings
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